Have you wondered why there is a person who is a favourite of everybody? This is despite of his appearance whether he or she is beautiful or not, and whether black or white. This is also despite of the person’s highest educational attainment. And it is also despite of the person’s status if he or she is rich or poor. Since everyone loves rich, beautiful, and intelligent person, you wondered why here’s your colleague or neighbour who is not rich, beautiful and intelligent, but everyone loves her or him. Well, there are two big secrets of dealing with people.
The Desire to be Important
Do you know what drives a certain person to aim higher? Do you know what drives a person to aim for higher educational attainment? Do you know what drives a certain person to work harder? Like for example, a certain father who works so hard for his family having a lot of part-time jobs just to provide for his family. And there’s also a mother who is not getting tired of working the household chores day and night with no day off. What do you think drives these two significant people in a household? Well, it is just because of the desire to be important. They are doing all the hard work because they feel that they are important. They are important in the eyes of their children because they need them.
A husband who doesn’t feel important anymore in the family could go astray and will look for someone who makes him feel important. It is the same for an employee who feels less important in the office would like to look for another company. An employee who feels very important in an institution, company or establishment may stay no matter how low-paying the job is. It is same as a colleague who can’t get along in the other group because he/she is not paid attention to. It is because he is not that important to them that’s why they don’t give too much attention to them. It is also same with an employee who always aims for a higher position because that employee feels very important if in the position.
People would look up to a person who is important. They would serve as a model on how to become important. This is because of our desire to be important.
The Desire to be appreciated
If you think your colleague likes you because you are beautiful and intelligent, well you’re wrong. They like you because you appreciate them so much. They like you even more because you can’t see their flaws only their assets. Remember, always search for what is good in them. If you always do something for a person, and you end up like unappreciated, it would make you feel depressed. It is because being appreciated for our hard work and efforts are what complete us. We work hard because we feel important, but what completes us is to be appreciated of our importance.
Like for example, an employee who is more productive because his boss always gives attention to her achievements. An employee who always gets compliment from the manager is eager to work harder. The appreciation the employee can get from the employer is what keeps her to stay despite of the low salary. This is the same as the teacher who always appreciates her students in class even in the smallest act of kindness. And it’s the same reason why a student doesn’t want to come to class anymore because it’s only his flaws are noticed by her classmates and teachers. It is because nobody wants to be in a place where only his or her negative sides are seen. The appreciation you get from others is what makes you like them. Same with you appreciating others, they like you not just because you are kind but because you appreciate them well. You may wonder why your daughter or son doesn’t like to stay at your house, well why don’t you take a time to evaluate yourself as a parent? You may be too occupied with all the problems in life and you forget that you have daughter and son who need your appreciation and not just your nagging. Try to appreciate those little things they do for their selves, or for the house or for you and you will see the magic.
If people like you because of how well you appreciate them or how you let them feel important, it would be easy for you to ask a favour on them. They would willingly do you a favour, and even make a favour for you even if you didn’t ask. That’s the secret of dealing with people.
Since people have a desire to be important and the desire of appreciation, let them feel that they are important and let them feel appreciated. In this way, you have no problem in dealing with any kind of person. Look for the positive and forget the negative. It’s either you let them feel negative or you make them feel positive because of how you treat them, then it’s your choice. It’s your choice if you want to hurt them with your words. You can either break or make a person because of your words.
Pic Credit – Google